a mutual understanding as what i thought...
what a pain-in-the-ass to find out someone that you know turn against you. while walking back from city, i was shocked to see hobart, my favorite place was covered with thick haze. probably it is due to the non-stop-bushfire that still happening in our closest neighborhood territories, victoria. i hope the bushfire will end soon and i would like to express my condolence to the family members of a victorian firefighter who died while performing his duties early this week in the Strathbogie Ranges, north of Yea, in Victoria. and a big applause to all tasmanian firefighters who went to melbourne yesterday to assist victorian firefighter in combating the bushfires.but anyway, as i walk home few things bothered me, envying the peaceableness that im trying to enjoy while walking. its about trust, and to me it is about mutual understanding that you have between you and your closest person eventhough you never say directly to them "I trust you". in order to face the consequences for trusting someone is a huge sacrifice. i never thought that the person who i trust almost my entire life will leak out my secret to their family member. while this mutual understanding is what i still grip on before, now i can see that the thing is slipping from my hand and it's falling. i would rather jump together with that trust but as i value it, it does not bring any good cause to me rather than pain. yeah, the next question that i will ask myself is "who can i trust after this?" would it be a person or someone who we cant see with our naked eye. i was reading this article few days ago, just to get a better understanding on how do we (i.e the human) interpret trust. in his article, Ronn Elmore, Psy.D. (Feb 2002) said,
" Doling out your trust before it's earned is often a recipe for disaster."
Im not sure whether to agree with him or not but its not about to agree or to disagree that concern me. what concern me is, to what degree should we trust others? even i can say that i never trust my family member as my past experience with them has taken away the "precious thing". who are we to judge others when we could not even trust them. while all this questions keep on pressuring me, i still cant figure out how should i deal with this person who leak out my personal story to his family member. i know i should be sincere, honest, take it positively and try to be calm with him. but through my observation, many of us even me sometimes, when we are under pressure or when we are in the middle of a problem, we get panicked and start doing something stupid. most of us actually have the skilled and capable handling this kind of problem, but yeah tell me which doctor can cure himself when they get sick. even a barber went to see another barber to get his hair cut.
In one of Imam Ghazali's famous written book, Ihya Ulum-Id-Din or The Revival of the Religions Sciences, he wrote,
"So it appears that for every affair there are secret and open matters. It is now open to you to observe both the secret and open matters or to observe either of them."
thus now, i'll let myself settle down and try to value the experience before i make my next moves. never cross in my mind to be so judgmental but as i learned through the hard way, our life is not in our own hand and every single thing that we witnessed everyday is beyond our control. not to say that i take things that happened in everyday life for granted but as i go further, i realise on how small i am compare to this big world or even the entire universe. therefore, at this moment, i'll say that i'll let time decide when it should happen. to all the people out there, have a good friday and have a nice weekend. cheers.
p/s:to value an object can be hard and complex but it is less riskier than to value our own personal experince...so let it be as how it should be...at the end of the day, it is there for you to learn about life...or else we won't learn...
posted by fat_elephant @ 11:28 AM
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